Discussion: I am a 35-year-old divorcee and have a very nice new boyfriend. I love him, but it's hard for me not to compare him to my ex-husband, who was an excellent lover.

Most of us compare with previous partners, not just in sex but in general. Memories from the past about a sex “idol” partner can be detrimental to an existing relationship. Sometimes, we have sexual memories as part of a fantasy, which originates in the more distant past and not necessarily from something real than the present. If we have a deep emotional connection with the partner, we should deepen the sexual experience through tantric sex, emphasizing the romantic-emotional experience.